Where Life, Love and Insanity All Come Together

Nothing boosts a child's self-confidence more than hearing these four words from their parents:  "I Believe in You" .  I was reminded of this just this morning as I saw a post on twitter that said the exact same thing (@More4Kids)

Sadly, so many parents get caught up in the physical needs and material desires of their children, that one of the simplest and most powerful gifts that a parent can provide gets overlooked.  What children really need  is to know that they are important to you, and that you believe in them.

Take a moment now and then to address something specific they are doing in their life, one on one.  Let them know that you noticed, and that they matter.  It doesn't have to be a big production, but for example I'd like to share what I did last summer for my pre-teen.

My daughter was gone for a few weeks in the summer visiting her biological father, I had decided to paint her room for her before she returned.  This time however, I did something different.

Just above her desk, I created a frame on the wall with some simple moulding (in lieu of a cork or message board).  I painted the inside with magnetic paint, then covered it in a slightly different shade than what was on the wall.  This created a "picture frame" with no picture in it, but the was was now magnetic so she could place pictures, notices or whatever she wanted on her wall above her desk. 
Here's the catch — I handpainted a message at the top of the framed area, that says:

                                   "I can achieve anything, I can become anything"

She tried to hide the smile (she's was a pre-teen, so...), but I could see the happiness in her eyes.  At that moment, I told her that we all believed in her, and that as she started the new year if she ever doubted she could do something, all she had to do was look at the wall.  Of course, she rolled her eyes — but it still meant something.

Through the course of the next year, there were a few dramatic moments when she was frustrated with her father, me, siblings, homework, sports team performance, friends, etc.  I went into her room and said very few words.  At the end of it, I always pointed to the wall and left.  I actually peeked in and saw her looking at it once.

It is the simple things that matter most to a child.  Don't forget as you get busy to let them know you care, and that you believe in them.

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